Last Poem of 2010

As promised, to you, my invisible audience, the last poem of 2010, a dark New Year's Eve. Today I will be performing a new piece, "Scissors and Resolutions" at the Bowery Poetry Club, will post tomorrow.

WAITING FOR THE NEW YEAR

Obediently,
I wait for permission to surrender.

My compulsions clutter the air with words and
eyes, nightmares, knives; another year rolls
past my wandering feet. I promise you, I
promise that I won’t leave this time, but I lie,
I lie, I lie down on mirrors and memory,
Chance lost like fillies on a running track,
and I remember, I remember my hands,
no longer my hands, I remember my legs
climbing mountains, I remember blood
stained arms and empty sockets, today
is the end and I’ve grown tired of my
skin, and of sleeping with Renoir on the brown
couch, no dogs barking, no footsteps, invisible
before the camera; I pledge my submission
to the ground, you may keep my burnt skies
and scorched questions, my lips are burning
as we move closer to resolution, I promise
you and again I lie, I lie on shards of glass
and broken book jackets, and I remember
the way you touched me in parked cars,
and I remember your hands were mine,
and I remember your eyes falling
like apples, and I wait for permission
to surrender, obediently, I wait.

© puma perl, 12/31/10